Twitter Updates

    follow me on Twitter

    Monday, January 31, 2005

    Thanks to my Amber Chia-connection, LSC, I was given a sugary Danish treat at Genting Highlands this evening. While wishing this Danish treat was actually a danish or some kind of pastry, it was Michael Learns To Rock.

    MLTR, not to be confused with LOTR, is perhaps the only Danish rock group that has managed to help define the “Cheras sound” and is responsible for changing the landscape of karaoke bars across Asia.

    If you’re a Type 1, then it’s your birthright to hate their music. You know the words but that’s beside the point. But having met the band after the concert and seeing this social revelation I just witnessed, I can’t help wonder if the band members themselves can’t stand their own music and the band that is Michael Learns To Rock.

    Outside an all-star TVB concert, I’ve never seen so many peace-sign-loving,-karaoke-junkies with boyfriends old enough to be their father or local women speaking English with weird accents to their white husbands old enough to be their father who are at the concert because their dumbass wife loves “Paint My Love” but is tolerating it because he has an Asian fetish.

    What a sight of tastelessness.

    And it did reaffirm my view that Asians, or in this case, Malaysians (or a majority of) have a knack of embracing the crap the rest of the world rejects.

    Good new though, that I managed to get not one, but two autographed postcards of the band. Bidding starts at RM50. DNA of the guitarist may be embedded in the card. I think he licked the pen he used to sign the card.

    Please excuse me while I undo some major damage to my taste buds after this evening.

    Friday, January 28, 2005

    Why I am blogging this evening?

    Because Yahoo! Games is down.

    One of my biggest fears have come true...well almost. After my biggest fear, which is death by drowning, I am now in the early stages of online games addiction. It is only a matter of time before I get a PS2 or X-Box. I just hope my friends will do the right thing and shoot me when I get to that stage. Last night, I spent four hours playing pool at Yahoo! Games. Amazingly enough, I still suck at it. And then there is this other total waste of time called Text Twist which I am officially addicted to. At least I now know that "asp" is an actually word.

    Sunday, January 23, 2005

    I would like to give the government and the recycling people a clue.

    Generally, I think most people would recycle if it were convenient. Right now, I save my Coke cans, plastic bottles, and then when I run out of space, I don't know where to dump the crap. I can't bring it to the trash because they don't have the multi-coloured bins for me to place my stuff to recycle.

    And the only place I know is 1-Utama which is on the other side of town. So I load up my Coke cans in the car and drive around for days until that day when I go to 1-Utama. Then, like a freak, I get out of my car, open the trunk and then I pull out this huge garbage bag full of cans. You have no idea how ridiculous I look and feel when I do this. All this for the environment.

    Therefore, if the government is really serious about getting people to recycle, all they need to do is to make it compulsory for all apartments and condos to have recycling bins within their compound, and all housing areas to have recycling bins within a one-kilometre radius. And then get people to collect them. No need for those stupid ads and silly recycling songs. OK, maybe a few ads to teach people about separating their trash for recycling just so that stupid Ah Beng does not think he is doing the environment a favour when he tries to recycle his used condoms.

    If they want to make their marketing campaign attractive, perhaps they could hold up a recycling bag like a nutsack. That worked for the TPC Egg guys.

    Sunday, January 09, 2005

    Let me start by saying that I am in love. This evening I met Amber Chia, that Guess? supermodel and Gloria Ting, Miss Malaysia/Universe 2004.

    I actually touched Amber Chia. She touched me back. We engaged in conversation. At one point while she was speaking, I think she got her spit on me and it landed on my lips. We were practically kissing. I touched Amber Chia. She asked for my card. I touched Amber Chia. She gave me her card. I touched Amber Chia. And she told my friend that I am cute. Amber Chia thinks I am cute. But I am sure in the same way she thinks Homer Simpson is cute. Fuck. Did I mention I touched Amber Chia? Anyway, I touched Amber Chia.

    I am pretty sure this page will turn up in Google's search results for Amber Chia.

    Anyway, tonight I am reminded of a truism in life. God is fair. All the good looks in the world, but some people really should just keep their mouth shut and just stand there naked.

    I touched Amber Chia.

    Tuesday, January 04, 2005

    **** *** Fuck

    For some people, when they want to get a expletive across on paper, instead of typing “fuck” or “shit” or “asshole”, they’d type “f**k”, “shi*t”, and “a**hole”. To which I ask, why?

    If you are going to say it, go right out and say it because there is no other p*ssible c*herent m*aning for w*rds with an asterisk in it. Well, except for N*Sync. If you are going to be polite, don’t even use the word at all. Or if you are looking to not offend the reader, don’t use it.

    It is almost as lame as people who say “F off!”

    Idiot: Batdude. You are an A-hole. Why don’t you just F off!
    Me: I am a what-hole? And you want me to what-off?
    Idiot: You know…butt-hole….and why don’t you just …you know…toot off and die.
    Me: Oooh…asshole. What A-hole. I thought you talking about a musical chord. A-minor. A-major. A-Hole. Say so la.
    Idiot: Errrr….ya.
    Me: Tell you what. Before I fuck off and die, why don’t you take your sister’s left prosthetic leg and shove it your ass and keep it there until your mama slams it all the way in until it comes back out through your nose.

    Never say I am not poetic.

    In conclusion, if you are going to use these words, at least me man enough to spell it right. With that, I wish you a fucking good day.

    Monday, January 03, 2005

    This 2005 is not all it has cracked up to be. It still feels like 2004 with a tinge of 1975.

    Other than a few wasted cheques because I wrote 2004 instead of 2005, the new year feels quite familiar. I am 33 years old. Almost half my useful life is about gone but things are starting to make more sense to me.

    And this is the turning point for the single man where he turns from "horny bastard" to "dirty old man" and for the single woman, from "independent woman" to just "old" and into the "25%-chance-of-having-a-child-with-Down-Syndrome" category.

    Oh well, at least I have bacon in the freezer.

    Saturday, January 01, 2005

    Let me tell you what I did on New Year's Eve.

    I was at home rearranging furniture in my work space and rewiring my audio setup. It started at 10 pm and it ended at 6 am. And let me tell you what joy it was.

    This is the "before" picture.

    I am going into geek mode now.

    Can you imagine, just three years ago, I had three racks of equipment. With new technology, I've shedded a lot of gear which are now sitting all over my apartment and I can't give it away!

    But today, I have the least equipment I've ever had and my production output is at the highest quality it has ever been. All the wiring was done in 15 minutes as opposed to it taking hours before. And everything worked when I fired it up. I am getting an erection just talking about it.

    Notice how streamlined things are now. And with my wireless mouse and keyboard, I can now move my mouse over to the music keyboard when I play. Sweet Moses! Although I need better speaker placement.

    After today, I think I am now ready for a long term commitment with the opposite sex.

    Man, do I know how to party or what?

    Happy new year everyone!